RIP 10/4/2012 - 1/3/2024

I was introduced to Ebarr when I adopted Athena in 2013. You have probably seen her on our brochures, website, and facebook page. As you probably know she is very well loved, and I just can't get enough of her. She is what brought me here to EBARR and started my career of rescuing animals.

Before I was a rescuer, I was just a dog mom to Apollo. Researching, I learned that pit bulls do best in pairs. I set out to find a female tan Pit Bull about 1.5 years old to be a companion to Apollo. Little did I know back then that there was probably ten thousand female 1.5 year old tan Pit Bulls in the Bay Area looking for homes and probably thousands more still suffering at the hands of their owners. I had no idea what rescuing was, and I certainly had no idea what was right in front of my face that I never saw. That would be the constant suffering of animals by human beings.

The connection between Apollo and then “Nana,” was instant. He picked her and she picked us. Apollo and I took her home and lived our life. I did notice that Ebarr needed help during the adoption process. They were definitely understaffed with competent people that actually wanted to get the job done instead of sitting around talking about somebody else doing the job. Being that i'm a natural born leader and I can't leave things alone, I started helping. I quickly became the vice president within just a few months. I fully took over the rescue in 2016 when the former president quit via text, leaving us with less than 20k in the bank when less than 4 months prior we had over 100k. Oh and did I mentioned we had 63 animals, none of which I brought in. Most were left by former irresponsible leadership individuals who were now walking away, without them.

Back to Athena, when I adopted Athena, she got a clean bill of health, and a free vet visit to update her shots. Within 4-5 weeks she was in critical condition due to something nobody could have foreseen especially the rescue. By this time I was probably vice president of the rescue, lol. Lucky for me, the day I adopted Athena I got pet insurance, because I just thought everybody did. She was diagnosed with an autoimmune disorder.

I won't overwhelm you with all of her medical issues but I will tell you most of them have to do with very poor breeding when it comes to pit bulls. These dogs are seen as throwaway animals and backyard breeders just don't care. Anyone breeding pit bulls is a disgrace. I have recently learned that some of our local politicians as well as many veterinary staff breed Pit Bulls. Why?????? Do you not understand what's going on? Have you never walked through a shelter or read a post from a shelter begging people to come adopt their pit bulls?

Well..... that's another post for another day.

Athena made it through that hospital stay and was officially diagnosed with an Autoimmune disorder in 2013, followed by 2 TPLO'S, one on each knee in 2014 and 2015, and Irritable Bowel Disease in 2015, She ate a carpet due to her IBD in 2019, which prompted me to cha ge my job because I would never put anyone else's family ahead of my own again. Inflammatory Menagitus of the Brain in 2021, Her Gull Bladder out in 2023, And is now she is in the final stage of Liver Failure.

Today is my 51st birthday, And I'll tell you my 50th birthday sucked but not as bad as this one does. Athena only has a couple of days left. So why am I writing this post now? Because I don't think I'll be able to in a few days.

Why does Athena matter to the Ebarr community?

Well, Ebarr would have been extinct in 2016 if she had not come into my life. For those of you who don't know who I am, I am the president of Ebarr and have been since 2016. I am the only remaining leadership individual, who was there in 2016 when the former president walked out, and I am the one that led the small group left at Ebarr and attempted to pick up the pieces. Before that, I was the Vice President for over a year. I am not discounting anybody who has helped ebarr along the way, or the rest of the leadership team. That being said, I also know what I've done and what I've sacrificed to do what had to be done to save this rescue.

The rescue was saved because I adopted Athena from this rescue, and I was not going to allow it to be thrown away like trash because it got to hard. People say all the time you can't save them all, I know that....... But I also know that sometimes 1 dog sets off a spark to something bigger than anyone could have known. Athena was that spark.

Athena is the light of my life, she is the one that taught me about unconditional love. It has been a challenging road being her mom. She only listens when she wants, and she does what she wants.

She has been my biggest pain in the a$$, because she's always done life her way. This dog truly has had nine lives, I guess she didn't get the memo that she wasn't a cat. She was formerly diagnosed terminal the first time in april of 2020, And I was given 3-6 months for her to live. Here we are three and a half years later. All the while she kicked Inflammatory Menagitus of the Brain a$$, because she wasn't ready.

I knew when I met Athena, there was a different kind of connection for me and Apollo. I will never be able to explain it, BUT I have seen it so many times over my last ten years of rescuing. If you look at those eyes, you see it. No one looks at me like Athena does.

Later this week, We will walk into our rescue vet who has been there for over 12 years, And I will walk out alone holding her collar. Her body will be taken to be cremated and given back to me in a box.

Never underestimate the power of one dog.

So when someone says to you, "You can't save them all", We know............. But we also know what dogs have the capability of doing.

Thank you for reading, caring, and understanding that this rescue is a little bit broken right now and I am a lot broken right now.


Our Jackie-Jack passed away late last month. He was an older guy at 16 years old. I noticed that he was getting crankier in the last few months so he went into the vet early in January. He didn't have any glaring issues but wasn't healthy.

Sometime during the month of January he must have gotten into a fight with another cat and the other cat bit him. Once the leg was noticed we started treating it right away. Unfortunately, did to his age, his body was unable to fight the infection even with the help of medical treatment.

Jack came to us in the summer of 2022. He was found by a good samaritan after somebody dumped him thin and sick. The medical staff did wonders for him and got him to a stable place for us to take over. He was a resident in Cat Room/Cattio 1 at the Martinez residence. He was a cranky old man when I got him, and he was a cranky old man when he went to the rainbow bridge, but you know the Martinez's don't discriminate especially in attitude, medical need, and especially looks.

Jack had someone who sponsored him and helped us pay for his thyroid medication every month. Jack lived his remaining year and a half happily eating whatever he wanted in a warm and safe environment.


There are all kinds of animals in rescues:

There are the ones that cost a lot of money, there are the ones that are easy, and then that's the ones that work the edges of your patience more days than not.

The first day I saw Salazar, he was hissing at me in front of a house in my new neighborhood that was deemed "The Hoarding House."

I said to him, "I'm gonna get you whether you like it or not and it will be for your own good."

When I woke up this morning a number of things happened. My FB memories showed this was the day 2 years ago that we caught the cat that would be known as Salazar, and when I went out to feed everyone that same guy Salazar had his head in the corner and when I stroked his back he cried.

I drove him to the hospital and left really not feeling like I would look into his eyes again. A bit later, I got the call.....he's blocked (meaning he can not pee or empty his bladder), he is emaciated, he is not in good shape, and there is probably more going on as well. Blocks can take a cat extremely quickly if surgery is not done quickly. Of course, my mind did what it does started assessing and searching for a solution. Turns out my suspicion all along that Salazar was over 10 years old was correct, how do I treat a feral cat with meds even if we can raise the money for surgery? And a block can easily come back even with special food, medicine and surgery. I knew the words were coming out of my mouth.

Is he knocked out right now? (Salazar can not be examined without being knocked out) yes, he is........"We have to let him go."

The answer was all about what was best for the cat.

It would be unfair to wake him up, run tests, Xrays, schedule surgery, have surgery, and cage him for the rest of his life so I could make sure he eats the special food and eats his medicine.

For the last 2 years, Salazar has lived in one of my cattios and been very happy (except when he escaped for a bit but continued to stay with his cat friends and I would often find him sitting right on the other side of the bars from the cattio cats). So happy that he made friends with Jasper who he was inseparable from and even allowed me to pet him on many occasions. Salazar had a happy last two years.

Feral life and outdoor life is hard on most cats. There are predators, diseases, parasites, lack of food, water, and a safe place to sleep. This is why we are so adamant that our cats not be allowed to go outside. We are not trying to add to the outdoor cat population, and at the end of the day, cats have a safer and happier life inside. The 8+ years were hard on Salazar no doubt.

Salazar was tough from the 1st day to the 730th day he was in my care. He was mean, the meanest and consistently let me know not to get too close to his striking area. He did soften but would change back when he felt like it. When you pour so much effort into an animal that is difficult, it's a different kind of grief. The questions come in my head: Was all the work worth it? Were all the scratches worth it? Were all the frustrating moments worth it? Was the time, effort, and money worth it?

Is it worth it to put effort into an animal that 99.9% of the population wouldn't bother to.

Without explanation, the answer is yes.

Salazar will join the hard ones (Juliette and Merrick) and rest here at my home. These are the animals that I learn the most from and look forward to seeing again.

Rest In Peace Salazar (Sally),

You mattered more than you know, and if you make it back here and you find yourself in trouble, you know where to come. (I tell them all that).


Juliette came to EBARR in 2010 as a spicy juvenile after finding herself in the shelter. She was probably someone's free kitten during that kitten season that they grew tired of her. Juliette's story could have easily ended at that shelter in 2010 as her behavior notes stated that she was "Highly Aggressive," which was true. But, the former president pulled her out of the shelter even though she was SPICY.

Juliette was one of the 61 animals in EBARR's care when we took over leadership. She continued to live at the EBARR facility for another year as we desperately attempted to raise the funds. We tried and tried to find her a forever home, but due to her aggression towards humans, it was an impossible task.

Juliette moved to our president's home in August 2016 and has lived with her ever since. It took over 9 months, but Juliette eventually stopped acting out when Nicole entered her room.

She slowly relaxed but never allowed Nicole to forget that she ran that room and, apparently, Nicole was just a guest.

One time she destroyed the cat room while the EBARR team attempted to get her to the vet using a net called a "Cat Nabber ." She had to have a muzzle put on and all Nicole could think was that she was a "Hannibal Lector" as she fought with Nicole while she was being examined. She slowly relaxed to a point that she would allow Nicole to pet her, on her terms. She was diagnosed with Kidney Disease around 2019 and had to be put on a special diet.

Juliette never received a single inquiry for adoption in all the years EBARR had her until, around 2020, someone inquired. It was at that moment Nicole realized that she could not put Juliette through the trauma of adjusting to a new home again.

Another year went by and, in 2021, Juliette moved with Nicole to a new home. Soon Nicole was able to pet her, hold her, and (surprise!)..... vacuum her? (She liked to be vacuumed with the hose part.) She would be the first on Nicole's lap and in her face asking for attention when Nicole came into the cat room.

We believe Juliette had fast-moving cancer that caused significant weight loss and dehydration resulting in a greatly diminished quality of life. Juliette took her last breath at about 3:30 pm on April 4, 2022.

Rest in peace Juliette, it's been a wild ride, and you will always be in our hearts... and you will forever be at home, your forever home.

*** Your life mattered ***


We have some sad news????

We helped Merrick find his way to the Rainbow Bridge this afternoon. ????

If you remember Merricks story started when a good samaritan saw him looking quite ill on the street. A plan was made and Merrick was trapped. He saw a vet several times and with every test we ran, his list of ailments got longer. This poor guy suffered from FIV, Stage 4 dental disease, a whole lot of abnormal labs which lead us to believe that he was FIP positive. Merrick started to develop sores on his joints. After a talk with the vet, we all decided it was the most humane decision to allow Merrick to go.

During the short time, we had Merrick he learned how to use the litter box. He was warm, fed every day, pain-free, and had a soft bed to sleep in. He didn't have to scrounge for food where ever he could find it, chew with a painful mouth, or drink water from the filthy gutters.

Fly high Merrick, ? ???? ????

I am not going to lie, you were a hard one to love but we would do it all again to get you off the streets.

RIP 5/10/2022


Today we said goodbye to one of our long-term residents, and his name is Patrick. Patrick had cancer and as he aged he became more and more unpredictable in his behavior.

***update added as I go through the stages of grief

**** If you remember, Patrick came to us in 2015 and adopted out as a puppy, and came back to us around The end of 2018 after the family decided they didn't want him anymore. Patrick had another false start when the woman who adopted him had forgotten she was moving out of the country shortly after adoption. Again Patrick came back to us.

I know it goes against popular belief but some dogs don't forget when people let them down, they remember their heartbreak. What makes this particularly hard, is at some level PATRICK has never recovered from losing his family.

He is just not the same happy-go-lucky doggie anymore. We definitely enhanced his life, but I think his heart broke many years ago when he realized his family didn't want him anymore. ????

As a rescuer, the buck stops with us and personally me. You can not imagine the guilt that I personally carry because of this circumstance; I am the one who choose this family as Patrick's guardian when he was just a baby, above all other families that wanted him. ???? And now he is a 7-year-old adult Pit Bull Dog. Statistically the hardest age and type of dog that fill up shelters across the country currently. And I just don't have any words for the 2nd adopter.

So again Patrick has become more and more unpredictable and unsafe to house. Most of the time he was fine, and sometimes he was not. These times when he was not fine became more and more frequent.

I have made 2 very hard decisions as the president of this rescue around behavior. In 2017 we put down a highly aggressive and unpredictable female named Princess, and today we put down Patrick. Each time it takes a piece of your heart with you and as rescuers, we have to find a way to do what is right and safest in any circumstance even if it hurts.

We have to consider the animal's overall well-being, the people caring for him daily, and his quality of life.

I am not pointing the finger here, but when you adopt a puppy, be all in.......forever...... some dogs don't recover when people make the decision to dump them. I do not believe it would have been in Patrick's best interest to find him an alternative placement where he would be in a cage with minimal interaction.

I truly believe that when we take on and save an animal and it is our job to the end to ensure that the animal and the people handling the animal are safe.

Patrick was in a great mood today. He was loved by everyone he saw. I looked into his eyes while he drifted off to sleep, and I told him I would see him soon.

Patrick is at peace and our hearts are broken, especially the ones who cared for him daily

Even though I chose peace above just being......I know it was the right choice.

Fly high boy and we will see you soon.

Patrick's story was told because we knew him and worked with him for 4 years. There are thousands of dogs in Contra Costa County alone every year whose stories are never told because they are quietly let out, thrown out, abandoned, abused, etc. People buy or get their animals from backyard breeders (the shelter isn't full of rescue puppies that grew up) because backyard breeders don't care about the animals.

Don't be afraid to speak up when your family, friends, co-workers, acquaintances, etc give a heartfelt excuse why they need to dump their now adult dog they had from puppyhood because of "Unforeseen Circumstances." Humans don't have a right to destroy physically or emotionally any pet that was trusted to them because they just don't want to do it anymore.

It is NOT a rescuer's job to clean up your mess, we try so hard....but unfortunately, there are more of you than rescuers.



I am very sad to announce the passing of our old gal Oleena.

Oleena came to us with a menagerie of health issues in October 2022; including cancer, thyroid issues, and compromised eyesight issues. She was 15 years old. I believe she was an outdoor cat and possibly raised with homeless people in the community where she lived. I believe she just got too old to be able to live outside comfortably.

She was picked up after attempting to go into the Willow Pass Safeway over and over again. She was probably begging for help in my opinion. She originally slept in her litter box and often in her own pee. It took months to get her to sleep in a bed. She graduated out of the quarantine and into Catroom 1 where she lived out her remaining days. She was a spunky girl who absolutely loved her Sheba Pate food, and never missed an opportunity to let you know she wanted some.

Older cats create a different type of challenge but you can't deny how good it feels to provide an elderly cat medical care, warmth, and safety in their last stage of life.

Oleena was with us for just 6 short months, but she passed in a safe environment where she didn't have to worry about her basic needs being met day to day. She didn't have to search for food or a safe place to sleep. As her last weeks approached, she started to sleep out in the Cattio area of Catroom 1. I would have to go find her because of the low temperature and bring her back in the room but would find her out in the Cattio in the morning in one of the many cubbies. She definitely knew what she wanted and just did it no matter what I said.

Forever in our hearts.....


Today we had to say goodbye to Amun-Ra at the age if 16 years.

If you remember he was dumped at the shelter by another animal rescuer. He was extremely depressed at the shelter as you can see in the second photo.

No one ever saw his eyes because he had his head down the whole time he was there. He came to us in November and we knew he was an old guy.

About six weeks ago I noticed him coming closer to me, something he had never done before. In the last three weeks he's even let me pet him which was extremely weird (1st photo). I knew from my experience with Salazar that it was time to go to the vet because I worried that something was going on and he could be in pain.

Today during his vet visit a large tumor and his abdomen was discovered. Of course, we presume it was cancer. Due to his old age, the best decision was to let him go.

For those of you that dump old animals at the shelter because it's hard, shame on you. When I took him I said it didn't matter if he lived one year, 1 month, or 1 day he deserved to not be abandoned at the shelter because of his advanced age and the likelihood of adoption was slim to none. doesn't care if the animals are an inconvenience they're still animals that deserve a good home, and maybe that home is ours.

Fly high buddy and remember if you end up back here and need help, you can always find us.

Ebarr rescues for life, not until it's not convenient or hard.